2022 is the worst year I've ever had to live through. I'm 30, almost 31, and this is the craziest year of my lifetime. How come our world is so fucked up, that in three months - could even say in the first two - the whole world decided to burn to the ground? Yeah, we've had the pandemic for two years now without an end in sight. Yes, the economy has been struggling ever since the pandemic started. But how in the fuck did it get even worse in just two months? I don't even know how to explain the war raging in Ukraine. It's just so insane that all of this has to happen at the same time. That it even happens at all, during a century when medicine, science and all-around knowledge is so high, we as humans should know better.
I live in Estonia. One of the small Baltics, that have taken Russia as a big threat always. We have never forgotten what was done to our people. As most Ukrainians probably. I work with Ukrainians every day. They are for sure the most optimistic people I know. I love them. Their realistic, but positive outlook on this whole situation makes it possible for me to sleep at night. They are sure victory will be theirs. And I have no other expectations to this situation. How could it ever end any other way? This is not a civil war. It's not a terrorist group in the country. It's not even a part of the country wanting to be a separate country. It's one of the largest countries on the planet trying to occupy a neighboring independent country. The shit that has replaced Putin's brain is incredible. There must be something wrong with him, on a molecular level, if he thinks this will end well for him. He has turned his country back in time 30 years and if he keeps it up, it will be back to the stone age for them. I mean, they are already crying about losing McDonald's and Coca Cola. No Adidas tracksuits, no new iPhones. Life must be sad for the average Russian.
I must add here, that I do not blame the Russian people for this. It is not their war, it is their leaders' war. And there's a simple fix to this problem. Just eliminate the problematic factor and all will return to the good old times, when Russians could use Visa/MasterCard to buy a Mercedes from the dealership.
I just don't know what to do. All my regular hobbies somehow seem pointless. Like they don't matter that much in comparison. I just started to read books again, and not for my bookclub, but for entertainment. I even went to the library for the first time in 10-12 years to borrow books. AND I'm reading in Estonian. Something I have avoided mostly for the same amount of years.
Knitting shawls is also like pointless. I have nowhere to go with them, no one to give them to. I think I have made a shawl to everyone who could use one.
I do have a cat now, but she is as much for comfort as she causes stress. Her health is a bit tricky at the moment and I just hope it ends well for us.
And my work. It keeps me too busy. I turned into a sushi chef. And I also have to manage the kitchen as the sous chef. A promotion I got three months after starting working in the place. I can't even put into words how nice it feels to be appreciated like that. I don't mean to bash my previous boss or workplace, but I was kind of taken for granted there a bit too much sometimes. This has been a good experience for the most part. Good for my low self-esteem for sure.
How did I usually finish these pointless rants? It's been two years since I last even thought about typing down my thoughts. Maybe I will pick it back up. Who knows, I for sure don't.
So. This is bye. Maybe forever. Maybe not. I guess only our fucked up Universe knows for sure.
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